Homemade Humor #4

‘So Collin, can you tell me who God is?’ Silence ‘Do you know who He is?’ Grim face and more silence ‘What did God do?’ Silence ‘Collin, talk to me. Why can’t you answer?’ ‘You tol’ me I talk too much. So I bein’ quiet!’ Overheard between Collin and his Dad.

While sitting with Jevan, waiting for him to pee in the potty chair, we were having a group hug with Rylen in there too. As I was saying, ‘I love you’, he chimes in with a big squishy hug and says, ‘I lub ‘oo, Mom!!’

He enters the kitchen like a ‘Whirlwind’, quietly assessing the layout and then plans just what would be best to mess up the place as Mom makes supper…. He quickly, and noisily, slids all the A B C Letters off the fridge and with great satisfaction listens to them clatter on the floor. Then spies the stool, to which he scurries and slides over to the stove. After climbing up and being told ‘It’s HOT!! Don’t touch!!’ He slithers over to his next ‘Natural Disaster Zone’. He pulls up the carpet from in front of the sink and leaves it in a heap 4 ft away. And then nonchalantly walks out of the room, as if it ALL went just according to plan!! Mission Accomplished!!! Now Mom has to clatter her way through those ‘letters’ to get to the fridge and step over, on or around the stool in front of the stove plus stumble over the carpet if she walks anywhere around the sink!! I declare it was a premeditated mission!! -Rylen

As Collin was getting dressed he remarked, ‘It been 8 days sin’ I weared this shirt, I not think it gonna fit me!’ He puts it on and say’s, ‘I guess it does.’

We walk out the door of Walmart and Jevan say’s, ‘It col(d), Mom.’ ‘Well, hurry, lets go to the van.’ He spies a piller thing, 5 ft out the door, gives it a BIG hug for 10 seconds and then walks around it. And around it and around it and around it. Oblivious to the cold and wind. And I couldn’t get him to leave the dumb thing!! And a couple of people were highly amused by the whole thing as well. At least they were understanding about it. ‘I remember those days, you can’t get them to hurry for anything or do what ya want them too.’

‘Mom, what all animals do people have on a farm.’ Together we name off cows, horses, pigs, goats, donkeys, chickens, ducks, sheep, goats and mice. Collin stands there thinking and then asks, ‘What else is on the menu??’

Love the way Jevan comes into the house… saying, ‘MOM! Mom. MOM. MOm.’ In a sing song way. Wish I could record it some how.The first ‘Mom’ goes up, the second goes down. And he says it over and over and over, no matter if I answer, until I come to get him undressed. At least it sounds better then hollaring or screaming.

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One Response to Homemade Humor #4

  1. Nita says:

    awesome post!:) lol

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