You know the saying about communication being one of the main keys to making a marriage strong. Well, I know it is true!!!
But another slant was brought to my attention the other evening and a new reality brought sharply into focus!
Communication is really a two-way street. Or should I say a 4-way street?!?! Not only do I need to communicate with my husband by being open and honest with him, I also need to be receptive to what he shares with me, by being open to what he tells me, no matter what feelings rise up within. I need to be careful with my attitudes too.
Real Life Example: The other night my husband told me that our week may not go as planned. There is hay needing to be done this week, and there is a good possibility of rain. I have a cousin getting married Sat. 3 hrs away. Well, to say the least, I promptly got upset. (Over rain that we have NO control over, but I took it out on the person who told me.)
My wonderful Hubby then tells me, ‘You always get after me to communicate more and better, so I am trying. But when you respond like that, that is when I don’t want to tell you stuff so you don’t have as much time to be upset with me over the circumstances.’
Hmmm, WOW!!! As much as I don’t like admitting when I need something, I sure needed that one!! I am one who lets circumstances dictate my happiness way too much!! But it also woke me up to the fact that my response to my husbands attempts at communication will encourage or discourage anymore communication.
If he doesn’t feel a positive response from his wife, he gets ‘a chewing out’, or a silent treatment – I can’t say I blame him.I wouldn’t tell someone stuff either if I knew they would respond in a negative way.
Communication is more than just talking, it’s attitudes when listening as well.